When I can’t sleep I always wonder if you were scared when you passed away.
I think a lot of us do this version of rehearsal when we can’t sleep. We project the big fear onto the quietest thing in the room because it’s safer than saying it out loud to another person.
So I’ll put my real question to you instead. Have you ever found yourself asking something impossible at 3am just to avoid the one you’re actually afraid of? What is the thought that keeps circling for you when the lights are off?